amazing♥

Have any of you seen the movie 'Tangled' form Disney? There's a scene in that movie where thousands of lanterns are released into the sky at night. It is absolutely breathtaking, and I found out, they actually do this in real life! In Thailand it's a tradition to do this once a year. I have to go see this sometime.. Adding it to my list of things to experience. 
Just look at this video. Gives me the goosebumps. There are many more on Youtube.
What are some things you'd like to experience in your life?

Love and lanterns,

Maria

here comes the sun♡

Today's weather is amazing. Blue sky, bright sunshine, no wind and heat!! I'm so psyched that it's finally summer! 'm going to lie out here in my garden all day and try to forget about some of the weird things and semi stupid mistakes I made last night while out with my friends.. I can be such a phone number-slut when I'm drunk, hehe..
When you're drunk, how do you change? Like, what kind of people du you end up talking to, how do you end up acting, where do you end up going etc.. I think it's weird how a thing like alcohol can change a person for a shorter period of time..

Apart from the alcohol and some tiny bites of a (delicious) cake from the party before going out last night, my diet is going great! But I have to stop calling it a 'diet'. It's just a new lifestyle. Anywho, it's going great! I run almost every day and can feel how I'm getting better and more persiverant. Awesome!
And I eat more vegetables and fruit. I'm so proud of myself, haha.. And the best thing? It's changed my mood - so I'm starting to feel happier♥

Have a great day in the sun!
Love and sunscreen,


Maria

beauty♥

It's such a beautiful day. I started it off by laying out in the sun for a while. Fell asleep because I haven't been able to fall asleep at night lately.. But mommy came and woke me up so it's all good!
Maybe I should take a shower and then head out for a long walk. Hopefully I can get to bring my sister's camera along. It takes the most gorgeous pictures! -Well, depending on what you're shooting, of course..

I hope you all had a beautiful morning! I'll be posting some photos on here sooner, hopefully!
Just wanted to say good morning :)


Love and tanning-lines,
Maria

it starts today

Two months. One diet. One total makeover. One goal.
 -That sounded like some lame trailer for a cheesy American movie. Oh well, the plan is; I'll start my diet and workout plan today so I'll be happy with myself in time for the U.S-trip which is in August. Wish me luck!
I'm feeling motivated, confident and determined - all good signs! I'm even on my way for a run now!
I'll run every single day, do strengthening exercises, go for a long walk some days, and make sure I exercise as much as I can in every other way (dancing, riding my bike etc.)
Now, for the other part of my plan; eating habits. Oh, those have always been the nr. 1 reason I am not happy with myself. Honestly, it's getitng old.. But it shouldn't be that hard.. Eat when you're hungry, stop once you're full. Eat what's good for your body. There. It's as simple as that.

But guys, I still need help when it comes to staying motivated - any advice? What do you do when it becomes hard for you to keep focus? How do you keep on track when it gets tough? Please, i need help. I cannot blow it this time♥


Love and running shoes,


Maria

Question!

So, you made a decision to finally change something; about yourself, about something else in your life, whatever. You know that if you hang in there, eventually you'll see results. But then.. once you've started working on the problem.. some time has passed by, and suddenly you get a sudden urge to go back to your old, safe ways of living and screwing your new plan.. What do you do to stay motivated? How do you stay focused on your plan and sticking with it?
I need some advice, guys.. I'm desperate.
♥

summer, ❤

are you all just as excited as I am?

.. and I'd give everything to be able to do it all with you by my side ❤

oops

So this morning I woke up around 11.30 am. Went downstairs, and there it was. A pizza box, just standing there on the stove. I could sense it was full of leftover pizza from last night, when I didn't eat anything and let the others go crazy and order takeout.
Of course I ended up eating all the leftover pizza, and continued with eating other things I could find in the fridge. Decided to write about it, I kind of have to teach myself that I can't hide my binge-eating incidents anymore.
My reaction at first was: You stupid bitch. I know I shouldn't eat stuff like that, I know it's wrong, and I know that being fit is more important to me than eating. But I figured, hey, it's not even 2 pm yet. I still have time to work out and burn of most of what I just consumed. I will work out for the next two months every single day, so I shouldn't be too hard on myself just because it's hard to start out on this diet. I know I have a deadline, but what's done is done, I shouldn't beat myself up about it.
Thinking positive is new to me. But hopefully it works. What I have to look forward to now is a 5K run, Tracy Anderson's Mat Workout, and hopefully some ass-kickin' zumba!! Bring it on, bitches!

Last night my best friend and I went to the midnight premiere of The Hangover Part II. Holy shit, it was funny! It did not disappoint at all. The funniest part was that they stuck to the original plot and progress of the story. The characters had not changed at all, which was great to see. I'm not sure if the jokes and most of the surprising events were as fun and crazy as the ones in the first movie, but that might just have been because of my high expectations for the movie.
I loved it, and laughed my ass off. And I did not eat a thing all day. A day to be proud of!!
I kind of rock.

Love and new shoes,

Maria

❤shoes❤

I need them. I do not own a pair of cute, everyday shoes. Dammit. But hey, what better excuse to buy new shoes than the change of seasons? Summer is a time for sandals, heels, and flip flops (not too fond of those)! If only I had the money to buy the shoes I want. That problem has in some way always stopped me from being able to create my perfect style and look. Hopefully that will change when I get a job somewhere..

So, after getting done with my workout for the day I will go shoe hunting! Going out tonight with my best friend - midnight showing of 'The Hangover 2' - and I want to wear something else than my worn-out, purple Converse. I love them to death, don't get me wrong, but I want to wear something-- more girly. Something with an actual heel.

Come to think of it, I actually need a new wardrobe. Not kidding, I hate everything I own, clothes-wise. Aren't I a picky little monster? It'll all have to wait til I get a job. But it can't hurt to look..
What is your must-have for the upcoming summer??


..I also need makeup.




Love and eyelash-curlers,


Maria

andrea's choice!

While browsing around on YouTube I found the cutest girly channel! This very pretty (and therefore believable) girl, Andrea, tells about her beauty secrets, hair styling- and fashion tips. She also posts how to tutorials on different hairstyles! I already found a hair style I want to try out for my bestie's 18th birthday! I've been wanting to become more thorough when it comes to styling myself and stuff like that.. This girl has saved my life! I love her videos!
Go check her out!

Last night was quite dramatic for me, I have to admit. My 'best' friend and I had an argument. Over facebook. How mature, right? Anywho, it ended up with me crying half the night, unable to sleep because I finally realized what I guess I knew all along.. Those girls I used to be somewhat close with.. are not friends of mine at all. It's amazing how mean they can be when the fake masks finally come off. I am so over those stupid, superficial bitches! I know I'm probably being too much right now, but it's my blog, deal with it!
At least I got to tell her how I feel. Too bad she was too immature to even respect that I disagreed with her side of the story. She's so.. ugh.
Glad to have gotten rid of her.


Love and curling irons,
Maria

drastic change ahead...

I have to months to get back in shape. Why the sudden deadline, you ask? because I am going to the US after all. And I don't want to go back looking bigger than I did when I left. I know it sounds insane, and I know I haven't been able to stick to a certain diet for very long at a time. But this time I have a secret weapon: Mom.
She is the most supportive and loving person I know. She says she has faith in me and that she knows I can do this. It means the world to me to have her by my side.

To keep myself motivated (which is crucial if I want to stick with this diet and stay focused) I will post a picture of me in a bikini each week.. So we can see how much my body will change. Every.. Sunday?
That means I have to find a bikini I like. Maybe I won't be able to post a picture this week. But I will start the diet.
I am freaking out. What if I order the tickets for my flight and I end up screwing up the diet? I'll be fat when I go to the US. All my friends will see. Shit. That can't happen.

If you want me to, I can write about my year in the US to let you know just what it means to me and why I'm unsure about going back. It's up to you ❤

Love and lovehandles,
Maria

motivation

I've been wondering; motivation. What exactly does that word mean? And why is it that some people just.. completely lack when it comes to being motivated? I'm not afraid to admit that I definitely am one of them. A bit ashamed to, maybe.
I found a website where this guy talks about ways to motivate yourself to do stuff.. I think it sounded pretty reasonable, but I've tried several of those methods before and.. I'm still fat and disgusting. Maybe I should try again?

If any of you have advice for how you motivate yourself, feel free to comment. And.. if you have issues with motivation, this would be a great place to admit it and promise (with me) to do something about it.

16 Ways To Get Motivated

1. One Goal. Whenever I’ve been in a slump, I’ve discovered that it’s often because I have too much going on in my life. I’m trying to do too much. And it saps my energy and motivation. It’s probably the most common mistake that people make: they try to take on too much, try to accomplish too many goals at once. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It’s not possible — I’ve tried it many times. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that’s hard. Still, I speak from experience. You can always do your other goals when you’ve accomplished your One Goal.
2. Find inspiration. Inspiration, for me, comes from others who have achieved what I want to achieve, or who are currently doing it. I read other blogs, books, magazines. I Google my goal, and read success stories. Zen Habits is just one place for inspiration, not only from me but from many readers who have achieved amazing things.
3. Get excited. This sounds obvious, but most people don’t think about it much: if you want to break out of a slump, get yourself excited about a goal. But how can you do that when you don’t feel motivated? Well, it starts with inspiration from others (see above), but you have to take that excitement and build on it. For me, I’ve learned that by talking to my friends about it, and to others, and reading as much about it as possible, and visualizing what it would be like to be successful (seeing the benefits of the goal in my head), I get excited about a goal. Once I’ve done that, it’s just a matter of carrying that energy forward and keeping it going.
4. Build anticipation. This will sound hard, and many people will skip this tip. But it really works. It helped me quit smoking after many failed attempts. If you find inspiration and want to do a goal, don’t start right away. Many of us will get excited and want to start today. That’s a mistake. Set a date in the future — a week or two, or even a month — and make that your Start Date. Mark it on the calendar. Get excited about that date. Make it the most important date in your life. In the meantime, start writing out a plan. And do some of the steps below. Because by delaying your start, you are building anticipation, and increasing your focus and energy for your goal.
5. Post your goal. Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra (“Exercise 15 mins. Daily”), and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. Put it on your computer desktop. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a model with sexy abs, for example) also helps.
6. Commit publicly. None of us likes to look bad in front of others. We will go the extra mile to do something we’ve said publicly. For example, when I wanted to run my first marathon, I started writing a column about it in my local daily newspaper. The entire island of Guam (pop. 160K) knew about my goal. I couldn’t back down, and even though my motivation came and went, I stuck with it and completed it. Now, you don’t have to commit to your goal in your daily newspaper, but you can do it with friends and family and co-workers, and you can do it on your blog if you have one. And hold yourself accountable — don’t just commit once, but commit to giving progress updates to everyone every week or so.
7. Think about it daily. If you think about your goal every day, it is much more likely to become true. To this end, posting the goal on your wall or computer desktop (as mentioned above) helps a lot. Sending yourself daily reminders also helps. And if you can commit to doing one small thing to further your goal (even just 5 minutes) every single day, your goal will almost certainly come true.
8. Get support. It’s hard to accomplish something alone. When I decided to run my marathon, I had the help of friends and family, and I had a great running community on Guam who encouraged me at 5K races and did long runs with me. When I decided to quit smoking, I joined an online forum and that helped tremendously. And of course, my wife Eva helped every step of the way. I couldn’t have done these goals without her, or without the others who supported me. Find your support network, either in the real world or online, or both.
9. Realize that there’s an ebb and flow. Motivation is not a constant thing that is always there for you. It comes and goes, and comes and goes again, like the tide. But realize that while it may go away, it doesn’t do so permanently. It will come back. Just stick it out and wait for that motivation to come back. In the meantime, read about your goal (see below), ask for help (see below), and do some of the other things listed here until your motivation comes back.
10. Stick with it. Whatever you do, don’t give up. Even if you aren’t feeling any motivation today, or this week, don’t give up. Again, that motivation will come back. Think of your goal as a long journey, and your slump is just a little bump in the road. You can’t give up with every little bump. Stay with it for the long term, ride out the ebbs and surf on the flows, and you’ll get there.
11. Start small. Really small. If you are having a hard time getting started, it may be because you’re thinking too big. If you want to exercise, for example, you may be thinking that you have to do these intense workouts 5 days a week. No — instead, do small, tiny, baby steps. Just do 2 minutes of exercise. I know, that sounds wimpy. But it works. Commit to 2 minutes of exercise for one week. You may want to do more, but just stick to 2 minutes. It’s so easy, you can’t fail. Do it at the same time, every day. Just some crunches, 2 pushups, and some jogging in place. Once you’ve done 2 minutes a day for a week, increase it to 5, and stick with that for a week. In a month, you’ll be doing 15-20. Want to wake up early? Don’t think about waking at 5 a.m. Instead, think about waking 10 minutes earlier for a week. That’s all. Once you’ve done that, wake 10 minutes earlier than that. Baby steps.
12. Build on small successes. Again, if you start small for a week, you’re going to be successful. You can’t fail if you start with something ridiculously easy. Who can’t exercise for 2 minutes? (If that’s you, I apologize.) And you’ll feel successful, and good about yourself. Take that successful feeling and build on it, with another baby step. Add 2-3 minutes to your exercise routine, for example. With each step (and each step should last about a week), you will feel even more successful. Make each step really, really small, and you won’t fail. After a couple of months, your tiny steps will add up to a lot of progress and a lot of success.
13. Read about it daily. When I lose motivation, I just read a book or blog about my goal. It inspires me and reinvigorates me. For some reason, reading helps motivate and focus you on whatever you’re reading about. So read about your goal every day, if you can, especially when you’re not feeling motivated.
14. Call for help when your motivation ebbs. Having trouble? Ask for help. Email me. Join an online forum. Get a partner to join you. Call your mom. It doesn’t matter who, just tell them your problems, and talking about it will help. Ask them for advice. Ask them to help you overcome your slump. It works.
15. Think about the benefits, not the difficulties. One common problem is that we think about how hard something is. Exercise sounds so hard! Just thinking about it makes you tired. But instead of thinking about how hard something is, think about what you will get out of it. For example, instead of thinking about how tiring exercise can be, focus on how good you’ll feel when you’re done, and how you’ll be healthier and slimmer over the long run. The benefits of something will help energize you.
16. Squash negative thoughts; replace them with positive ones. Along those lines, it’s important to start monitoring your thoughts. Recognize negative self-talk, which is really what’s causing your slump. Just spend a few days becoming aware of every negative thought. Then, after a few days, try squashing those negative thoughts like a bug, and then replacing them with a corresponding positive thought. Squash, “This is too hard!” and replace it with, “I can do this! If that wimp Leo can do it, so can I!” It sounds corny, but it works. Really.

There we go.. let's do this, people!

Love and positive thoughts,

Maria

insomnia

I am so lame to keep posting when I know that not a single person in the world is reading what I write.
With that out of the way, I think I may have found my calling here in life. A guide. How cool would that be? New destinations, new cultures, new people, new experiences all the time! I would get to see so much which would be incredible since I hate being stuck in one place for too long at a time. Oh my gosh, I cannot believe I didn't think of it any sooner!

The guide school consists of a 1 month course in Barcelona. After the one month filled with hard work, new experiences and prep-courses, you get a diploma and free job interview with different traveling agencies, and you're almost guaranteed a job! If you work as a guide somewhere for 12 months - the company will pay the amount of money your 1 month prep course costs! So, an education for free.. and a new job. The dream job. Hell yeah!

The school is 20.000 DKK, however. I am not going to be able to raise that amount of money before November. And certainly not if I also still want to earn money so that I have enough to attend the musical-academy next year. But.. do I really want to do that? Is acting, dancing, and singing just a hobby for me and would I be more happy spending the rest of my life working as a guide?
Hmm.. My two passions, performing and experiencing.. Which one do I choose?
 -And who says I have to choose?

I could always wait for a few years with the musical academy and get educated as a guide now.. I'll earn money quicker. Oh wauw, guess I'll have to talk to my mom about this. But I am so excited!
Annd, now I can't sleep. Great, Maria. Just great.


Love and tanning lotion,
Maria

the definition of my worst enemy

addition to my goals..

I'm already working on the things I need to get done to reach my goals for December. My workout today will consist of a long walk and strengthening exercises. Awesome. And, for the first time I will actually try to listen to my body and only eat when I'm hungry and be smart about what I eat, too. Food has been my frienemy for way too long.. Longer story about that later on.

Another thing I recently discovered was that.. The big group of girls I've known since grade 1 and have always considered my best friends.. Are over me. They don't want anything to do with me and apparently have no intentions of ever spending time with me again. Great friends? I think so!

It started when I went to the US as a foreign exchange student two years ago. When I came back, the girls had kind of formed a new kind of friendship. A let's-be-best-friends-exclusively-and-not-give-others-a-chance-to-become-a-part-of-the-new-fake-friendship-we-have sorta thing. Even when I was feeling depressed for so long after getting back and having to leave my American family behind, they were nowhere to be found. Wow. Don't I feel special.
I know if I confronted them they would magically turn the situation around to being about me not telling them how I feel or being smart enough to ask them to help me. When you're best friends, you're not supposed to ask for help. Sometimes people can use their heads and realize on their own that people close to them are hurting and that they should do something about it.


So.. A new goal has been added to my list. Make friends. New ones.
I mean, of course I have friends, but I miss having a big group of friends that do stuff together all the time.. I had one of the best groups ever in the US. But no chance getting that back. So, by Christmas I hope to at least have some plans with new friends for the weekends!
Now, where can I find me some friends.. ?


Love and matching earrings,
Maria

good morning!

This is one of the cutest videos ever. What a great way to start my day. Everybody Loves Raymond, blogging, and this adorable little kitty. Have a good one, everybody.

❤

guess what..?

I just signed up for four weeks of nothing but hip hop dancing every day! I am so excited, dancing is one of the things I do best (and the list of things I do best is.. not that long). On top of that, a shorter course of hip hop/street dancing and ballet! I know, I am not ballerina material.. But every great dancer has some sort of knowledge about ballet. So.. Just hand me that little pink tutu and some banana-shaped shoes, please!

Dancing is my passion. You know, the one thing we all have that makes us feel more alive and special than  usual? Well, dancing does just that for me. When I'm on the stage I just feel invincible, like nothing can hurt me and like I actually have something to offer to other people. Like I'm not worthless anymore.
And the adrenaline rush of performing is the best!
So, stay tuned! Soon I will be popping up in different dance movies out there.. Watch out, Channing Tatum!!
.. -Just kidding. I love him. Someday I'll marry him and we'll have cool little street-babies. With oversized hoodies, basketball shorts and caps.


Peace out!
Maria

my new new NEW plan.. ❤

I now have a new plan for getting in shape fast enough to reach my goal for December!
First, I have to stop hating myself for screwing up the first 150 time I tried doing the exact same thing. Blaming myself and destroying my self esteem even more is not going to help. So, starting tomorrow, I'm commencing operationtinytrudy.

I really am excited that summer is about to begin, but do you know the feeling you get when it's around 11 AM, you just woke up, just had enough energy to drag yourself into the living room in front of the tv.. One lousy show comes on.. then another.. then another.. Then a couple of hours pass, and you look outside the window, and think to yourself, 'the sun is shining, the sky is blue, the birds are singing.. I should really go outside', and yet.. You stay put.
For some reason it's difficult for me to get off my lazy ass and enjoy the best thing about summer; the weather. Is it just me? I don't believe that. Come on, I'm sure I have some tv-addicted slackers out there.. Don't be afraid to admit it.

Well, my point is.. Tomorrow I will be outside for a long time. -Considering the fact that my entire family is in because of the stupid holiday. Oh, yeah, I'm not completely fine with being around my family all the time. I must be independent enough to actually get tired of 'em.. Don't judge me, you don't have to live with them!

So, asking all my (non-existing) readers.. Tomorrow is all about enjoying summer. Get off your ass and do as I do ♥


Love and lottery tickets,
Maria

the very first

Ok. New day, new beginning, new blog, new post. Here I go.
Hello! And welcome to my newest blog (soon to be the only one, I think) where I'll spend the next year or so trying to find myself. A lot of stuff has happened to make me who I am right now but we'll get into that later on, where you'll also get to learn much more about what kind of person I am.

Since one of my goals for December is to lose some weight (believe it or not I used to be what I would call skinny) my day will mostly be about working out. Good thing I have the entire living room to myself! Oh yeah, I don't go to school. That shit did not work out for me - right now, anyway. Luckily my parents have been there for me through it all.

My confidence has gone from low to non-existent over the past months which sucks. But I'm working on that problem, as I am with multiple other problems I'm dealing with at the moment. Now, I will promise you one thing; This blog will not be depressing. I will not write entire pages about how bad I feel about myself or how ugly I look or how fat I feel. I get enough of that inside my head. This blog is about me being positive about changing what I'm not satisfied with about myself.

This blog will also be a bit random, I'm afraid. But hey, that's me. I really hope you enjoy reading about what is sure to be one very interesting year for me.


Much love,
Maria